Friday, February 17, 2017

Perfect in Weakness

am linking up for Five Minute Friday.  The FMF is hosted by Kate Motaung on her blog Heading Home. Today's prompt is "weak". It was so good to see this crew and get back into the groove of FMF. We'd love to have you join us.  Just hop onto Twitter on Thursday evenings and follow the #fmfparty. Hope to see you there! 

Every Sunday, like clockwork, my phone would ring right before three pm. 
Then one day, it just stopped. 
It's so hard to watch her health deteriorate; to watch her become weaker,

My mom is a beautiful woman 
A woman who has lived most of my life with a mental illness
Then over a year ago, a dr uttered the words dementia too.

She was doing so well.
Even stayed at my house last summer
My sister and I and mom had so much fun.

In the last months though
I wait for my phone to ring 
And it doesn't ring
But then one day
I get a surprise
My phone rings and she asks what I am up.
Its in those moments that I think nothing is wrong.
Its in those moments that I have hope.

I am clinging to the precious moments we have
The moments where she still knows our names
Still knows who she is too.

Together we are made perfect in our weakness
Weakness that comes in all sorts of forms
Doesn't it?

I think of my dad who thought he was weak
Weak when he divorced my mom
But he was actually strong
Doing what was best for all of us

Weakness has a way of breaking in
When we least expect it
But God gives us strength

I am strong.
I am beautiful.
I am enough.
We all are.

38 comments:

  1. You is smart. You is kind. You is important! xo

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  2. Prayers for your mom and your family, Tara. I'm so sorry, and can't imagine what that is like for you. Your post is very real and open and beautiful. And you are right: God strengthens us in our weakness. Love to you, friend <3

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    1. Thanks Mandy! Love to you too!

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  3. Oh.My.Heart. sending more prayers for you, your Mom, your fam, your own breaking heart that yet beats strong with love and hope for the world. Thanks for including your Dad in this post.

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    1. Thank You! Can't tell the story without my Dad in it!

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  4. Thank you for sharing your beautiful heart. What a blessing you and your sister are to your mom. I have a friend who watched her mom grow weaker with Alzheimer's and the journey is hard but is nothing like weakness. Prayers for all of you.

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    1. Thank You! The prayers are much appreciated!

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  5. Oh Tara. Prayers for you & your mom.... We just got back from a trip to see my grandmothers, both of whom are diagnosed with dementia. It was hard.

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    1. Thank You! Hope you had a great trip!

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  6. Tara-
    Have you known how similar our stories weave? My mom is from ND, and she was the only brave one to leave the state of her family. My aunt visited us last week because my mom too was recently diagnosed with early stages of Dementia. Solidarity sister! I hope you have a good week, month, year with your mom. I have enjoyed spending more time with my mom now that she had fully retired from working. Love, Jenn
    p.s. Thank you for coming by my blog today and commenting too!!!

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    1. It's so crazy how similar our stories weave...the beauty of Gods amazing tapestry! I'm sorry you are going through this too! Love you friend.

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  7. This is such a hard journey for you and your family. Praying for you all. I love this:
    "Weakness has a way of breaking in
    When we least expect it
    But God gives us strength"
    and I love that in our weakness we can know him strengthening us.

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  8. tara, sorry to hear of this hard time you are having. my mom struggled most of her adult life with depression. later, she died after a couple of years of dementia. it was sad.

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    1. I'm sorry you know this story too. Blessings to you. And thank you!

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  9. Tara, thank you for sharing an intimate piece of your story. I can only imagine how difficult and heartbreaking it is to watch your mom, to see your relationship with her change. I'm saying a prayer for you tonight, friend.

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    1. You're welcome! Thanks for the prayer. It's so greatly appreciated!!

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  10. Praying for you friend. My mother was recently diagnosed with early stages of dementia. We don't know what tomorrow holds, but I'm trusting. She doesn't know the Lord, so I'm praying she will give her heart to Him.

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    1. Thanks! I'm trusting along with you sister.

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  11. Tara, this is both heartbreaking and uplifting at the same time. I'm in awe, and praying for you and your mom.

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  12. Tara, thank you for sharing your journey here. Yes, we are all weak but in that we can be strong through Jesus. Praying for the grace of God to show up in those places where you can connect with your mom again. xoxo

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  13. Tara, your heart is beautiful. Your strength is too. Keep holding out with hope and openness. Keep writing your story: it's important. Hope you're feeling better too!

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    1. Thank You, Christina!! And I am feeling much better.

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  14. Tara, thank you for your post. I am realizing more and more that the admission of weakness is strength. It certainly opens us up to the strength of the Lord.
    I am praying for you and your family. Dementia seems prevalent in the women in my family. The thing I am grateful for is the witness my elders have been in being there for the matriarchs in my family.

    Thank you for sharing such a precious glimpse into your life and for visiting my blog.
    God bless you.

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    1. Thank You!! And you're welcome! God bless you too!!

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  15. Thank you for sharing your journey with us Tara. I will be praying for your mom and your family.

    Jolene

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    1. You're welcome and thanks!

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  16. This is beautiful. Great job using the prompt word this week. :)

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  17. Oh, Tara! I'm so sorry that your mom has this additional diagnosis. I saw my aunt for the first time in three years this weekend, and it's so sad to see how Alzheimer's has clouded her memory and hidden her once vibrant personality. Praying for you, my friend!

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    1. Thank You! The prayers are always appreciated!!

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  18. Tara, this post drew me in to your story and left me resonating, reflecting, and raising you up in prayer. Thank you for this glimpse into your narrative. When we are stripped of our fleshly resources, our weakness is revealed and it is then that we recognize the true source of our strength.

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    1. Wow! Thank You! And amen!!

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  19. Tara, lovely and bitter and bittersweet and so much like the fragile beauty that is love.
    Thank you for sharing such a private moment of wistfulness!
    Love,
    Tammy

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    1. Aww I love that description. Thanks! Love you too!

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Your comments totally make my day!