Wednesday, November 02, 2011
Weighing the Pros and Cons
Being a 33 year old single woman is no easy feat! I find myself constantly asking myself, and most importantly, God when it will happen for me! I wonder if I will ever get that opportunity. I understand that it may never happen and that is hard to accept and understand. I find myself asking, "Would God put this so deeply on my heart if it wasnt meant to be?" I also find myself evaluating my singleness at my job. Sometimes (not at all the time but it does happen) wonder if parents have a hard time seeing me as an authority because I havent been in their shoes before etc! And that can be frustrating! In addition, I find myself reflecting on what I can do to make it happen FASTER! I know this isnt realistic but I do sometimes catch myself thinking along those lines. I love being around babies. I truly am happy for my friends when they get engaged and start their own families. But honestly, there is a part of me who is sad too! Which leads me to a conversation I had the other day with a colleague. Now the conversation we had was about adoption. This person asked me, "If I have ever thought about adopting and being a single mom?" They proceeded to say they didnt suggest it but they also said that it is not out of the realm of possibilities. It lead to a great conversation. And to be honest, I have vaguely thought about this topic but I have thought about it. I have listed some of the pros and some of the cons! It would be no easy thing but it is something that I have been thinking more about since that conversation. It is not something I will act on in the near future.........but it is something to continue to pray about etc! And after all these thoughts, I find myself simply trying to continue to cling to God's grace and know that God is in control!